Comparison is The Thief of Joy in the Age of Social Media

You’ve heard the old adage, “Comparison is the thief of joy,” and in today’s world, this couldn’t be more true. With social media dominating the way we consume content, it’s all too easy to compare our lives to the curated snapshots we see online. But here’s the thing: you don’t actually want the lives of the people you’re looking at on social media. The truth is, social media isn’t real. It’s a highlight reel. It’s a collection of the best moments—or worse, crafted moments—carefully orchestrated to present a certain image. As someone who worked in marketing for over ten years, I can tell you firsthand just how manufactured everything is online. And while this is a conversation many have had before, I think it’s worth repeating: what you see on social media is not the full story.

The Danger of Comparison

One of the most harmful effects of social media is the way it encourages us to compare ourselves to others. When you’re scrolling through endless photos and videos, it’s easy to start measuring your own body, lifestyle, or achievements against someone else’s. But the truth is, you don’t know these people. You don’t know how they treat others in their personal lives. You don’t know their traumas, struggles, or insecurities. What you’re seeing is the version of their life they want you to see—not their full reality. And when you let yourself fall into the trap of comparison, you’re stealing your own joy. Instead of aspiring to someone else’s life, remind yourself: I don’t want their life—I want my own life, one that I’m genuinely happy with. It’s important to understand that many people who are overly focused on social media—constantly longing for what others have—are deeply unhappy with their own lives. They believe that the life they want is out of reach, but it’s not. It’s closer than they think, if only they’d stop wasting energy on comparison.

Social Media Steals More Than Joy—It Steals Time Hence Why It’s Free

Comparison isn’t the only way social media steals joy. It also steals your time—time that could be spent living your actual life. If you’re spending hours every day checking notifications, scrolling aimlessly, or “catching up” on posts, you might not even realize how much of your life you’re giving away to your phone. Many people say they don’t have time for the things that would bring them peace—like mindfulness, exercise, or hobbies—but they’re unaware of how much time social media is consuming. One of the first things people often do when they wake up is check social media. Instead of starting the day with something meaningful, like meditation, stretching, or journaling, they dive headfirst into the endless noise of other people’s lives. This habit not only robs you of your morning peace, but it sets the tone for a day filled with distractions. Overusing social media can leave you feeling drained, anxious, and dissatisfied with your own life—because instead of being present in your own reality, you’re consumed with someone else’s.

The Impact on Real Relationships

Social media doesn’t just affect your relationship with yourself—it also affects your relationships with others. Many people use social media as a way to “keep up” with friends and family, but let’s be honest: is liking someone’s post the same as maintaining a meaningful connection? Instead of calling, texting, or meeting in person, we settle for surface-level updates. But do you really need to know what smoothie someone had for breakfast or every detail of their weekend? Probably not. What you do need is to invest time and energy into the people who matter to you in real life. By overfocusing on social media, we neglect the real relationships that could bring us joy and fulfillment.

Avoiding True Vulnerability

Social media has also become a comfort zone for many people—a place where they can avoid true vulnerability. It can be tempting to live in the bubble of likes, comments, and virtual validation, but this bubble can also become a barrier. If you’re not putting effort into building real connections in your life, you might find yourself feeling lonelier than ever. Yes, the internet can help you meet new people—but it’s not a substitute for genuine, face-to-face relationships. True human connection requires openness, effort, and trust. It requires stepping outside of the carefully curated space of social media and engaging with the messy, beautiful reality of life.

Social Media: A Tool, Not a Master

Social media is a tool, and like any tool, it’s neither inherently good nor bad. The problem lies in how we use it—or how it uses us. When you let social media dictate how you see yourself, spend your time, or connect with others, you’re handing over your joy. So, the next time you find yourself reaching for your phone, ask yourself: Is this bringing me joy, or stealing it? Instead of getting lost in the curated lives of others, focus on building a life that brings you genuine happiness—a life that’s yours and yours alone.

xo Jessica